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Things We Learn By Middle Age
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seraph
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Joined: Jun 21, 2003
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Location: Firenze, Italy
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 13, 2003 7:14 am    Post subject: Things We Learn By Middle Age Reply with quote  Mark this post and the followings unread

Things We Learn By Middle Age:

1. If you are too open-minded, your brains will fall out.

2. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian;
any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

4. Artificial intelligence is no match for
natural stupidity.

5. If you must choose between two evils, pick
the one you've never tried before.

6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room
with a glance.

7. Not one shred of evidence supports the
notion that life is serious.

8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

9. For every action, there is an equal and
opposite government program.

10. If you look like your passport picture,
you probably need the trip.

11. Bills travel through the mail at twice
the speed of checks.

12. A conscience is what hurts when all of
your other parts feel good.

13. Eat well, stay fit, and die anyway.

14. Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth.
Deal with it.

15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.

16. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind
and narrowness of the waist change places.

18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.

19. Junk is something you've kept for years
and throw away three weeks before you need it.

20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

21. Experience is a wonderful thing.
It enables you to recognize a mistake
when you make it again.

22. By the time you can make ends meet, they have moved.

23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

24. Someone who thinks logically provides a
nice contrast to the real world.

25. It ain't the jeans that make your butt look fat.

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elektro80
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Joined: Mar 25, 2003
Posts: 21959
Location: Norway
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 13, 2003 5:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote  Mark this post and the followings unread

Hihi! Excellent!
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